Tuesday, October 21, 2014

SOMETIMES ONLY MOM CAN MAKE IT BETTER?

Yesterday I cleaned up all the material I’d removed from the flowerbed on the south side of the house. I hadn’t expected to be able to do this because it was supposed to rain. When the sun came out I couldn’t resist being outside even if it was to clean up my mess. It felt good to bring order to the space, to be hot and sweaty and admire my own progress. It’s amazing how feeling good can change in a very short time.
My neighbor had told me about the yellow jacket nest at the edge of our properties. She’s deathly afraid of stinging insects and said she’d never go near it. I assured her that I would take care of it…they don’t scare me. I even related the story about the wasp nest in the raspberries of the neighbor across the street. The old gentleman who lived there then had been a welder, and when I showed up after dark in my tank top, shorts and sandals, he was waiting clad in all his welding gear. He held the flashlight while I used clippers to snip the raspberry cane just above the wasp nest and it fell into the waiting garbage bag which he quickly twisted closed. I still chuckle about our individual expectations with regard to those wasps after dark.
As of yesterday afternoon, I hadn’t done anything about the yellow jacket nest. It was still there and apparently, even though I was merely raking the leaves beneath the rhododendron, they took exception to my removing the leaves above their nest. They began to fly about and fret, but I ignored them and continued with my raking. I guess they didn’t like that either, or at least one of them didn’t, because I felt a sharp sting through my glove. I yanked my glove off, didn’t see a stinger or anything like that and sucked hard on the stinging area. This didn’t help much at all.
Unfortunately, I couldn’t just stop and walk away (well, I could have, but chose not to). I had to put my tools away, move the yard waste container to its proper location and close up the garage before I could go inside. By then, the sensation in the area between my thumb and first finger on the top of my hand had gone from stinging to painful. I wanted my husband’s bite relief pen. I rummaged through his lunchbox and desk (something I never do) before I finally woke him up to ask where it was. Should have been there he responded. Later, when he got up, he emptied out his lunchbox and couldn’t find it. This morning when he put everything back, there it was. Once again, my belief that items go to another dimension for a time is sustained.
Then, I tried to remember what my mother did when I was a kid. That’s the only time I can remember ever being stung which is probably why the idea of getting stung didn’t carry much weight. Besides “mommy-care” baking soda, meat tenderizer, ice all sort of came to mind so I gave them a try. Nothing seemed to work and I found myself wishing my mother were there to take care of me.
Now, that may seem a little silly, especially at my age, but it would have felt so good to have her tend my owie. Even more than that, I know if she could have treated me and then held me while I cried and felt sorry for my poor yellow jacket-stung self, she would have made it all better.
My mom’s been gone for more than 16 years now, and she surely didn’t provide much in the way of “mommy-care” for many years before her death because I wasn’t in need (or didn’t think I was). Still, I always knew that no matter how much something hurt (or felt good for that matter), she was always there to make it all better (or celebrate). I was rather amazed at how strongly I wanted her with me yesterday and how positive I was that she would have made it all better.
Instead, the sting continued to hurt for the rest of the afternoon and all evening until I went to sleep. This morning, before my eyes were even open, my hand itched so badly, I wanted to use a wire brush on it. The application of the bite sting stuff once it reappeared hasn’t helped much.  It still itches like crazy, but I’ve become sure of two things…(1) I won’t be so dismissive and glib about future stinging insect encounters, and (2) I’m sure mommy would, indeed, have made it oh so much better much sooner.

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